GOING BACK TO THE NOTEBOOK - 2009 -

84LBS

Food avoidance
No excuses
No binges
COME 2009 - THE MIN OF - I AM BACK

DO not LET ME DOWN!

the plan in simple terms
31st: 11-3 / 7-CLOSE NOTHING
1nd: 1- CLOSE NOTHING
2nd: 3rd: 6-CLOSE (Lunch) 400
4th: 12-7 NOTHING
5th: 6- CLOSE (Lunch) 400
6th: 12-3 / 6-CLOSE NOTHING
7th: 12-3 NOTHING
8th: Leave for Durham

Kept 29th - no food - but day off posed issues - but not too worried - was 8.8 last night - so this is majorally easily fixable within a short time - and now working on the second which was the second issue.

adding to new years resolutions - no choc, junk and avoid bread and cereal too

Анорексия протекает в несколько этапов. Начальный период — формирование недовольства внешностью, сопровождаемое заметной потерей веса. Затем следует аноректический период — снижение массы тела на 20—30%. При этом больной активно убеждает себя и окружающих в отсутствии у него аппетита и изнуряет себя большими физическими нагрузками. Из-за искаженного восприятия своего тела пациент недооценивает степень похудения. Объем циркулирующей в организме жидкости уменьшается, что вызывает гипотонию и брадикардию. Это состояние сопровождается зябкостью, сухостью кожи и аллопецией. Еще один клинический признак -- прекращение менструального цикла у женщин и снижение полового влечения и сперматогенеза у мужчин. Также нарушается функция надпочечников вплоть до надпочечниковой недостаточности. Последний период — кахексический — снижение веса на 50% и более. При этом возникают безбелковые отеки, нарушается водно-электролитный баланс, резко снижается уровень калия в организме. Электролитные нарушения на этом этапе могут привести к смерти. По статистике, без лечения летальность больных нервной анорексией составляет 5—10%.

My thinspiration

Elle l'a fait - moi je peux aussi

the plan in simple terms

29th: 3-CLOSE NOTHING - Throw away lunch - now shopping in morning
30th: OFF NOTHING - DO SOMETHING!!!
31st: 11-3 / 7-CLOSE NOTHING - NOTHING - NO EXCUSE YOU ARE AT WORK!
1st: 1- CLOSE NOTHING - I'm at work all day...
2nd: OFF (NOTHING - LONDON IT UP = Tattoo of 2 falling feathers
3rd: 6-CLOSE (Lunch) - Soup and fruit salad 400
4th: 12-7 NOTHING
5th: 6- CLOSE (Lunch) - Soup and fruit salad 400
6th: 12-3 / 6-CLOSE NOTHING - STAY IN SPLIT AND READ
7th: 12-3 NOTHING - STAY OVER IN HOTEL ROOM
8th: Leave for Durham

I know what you are thinking - I cant do it for 2 days how will you do it for 5 days? Because I will win the fight in my head because I'm running out of time and I know I can do it - so why wait?

When that thought to eat comes into my head and I start to make excuses that is when I need to concentrate and get out of the house without any money at all. Also weighed myself today and I am disgusted to say I was 122.5lbs - that is 10.5lbs I have put on in 3 weeks. But I have also lost that in a week. So If I dont eat for 5 I should be back to there and then I will lose more and more and more :-) Will weigh myself on the second of jan in the morning - not until then. And I will not go astray from the plan...

screw up

My willpower is flagging because it is almost new year - thank god. Didnt eat until 8pm then ate a lot. Tomorrow mummy wants to go to Primark but I do not want to eat - have lunch in room and throw it away. I have to battle with the willpower more and more. I know I can work on an empty stomach and I know that if I make it tomorrow I can make it without suspicion to new year - as long as I dont think i cant - battle with willpower and get thinner!!

New Years Resolutions

1 - I will weigh 84lbs by my birthday

2 - I will not eat any chocolate or junk food ever this year (including options hot chocs) nor binge

3 - I will drink diet coke and water to the max and only ever have 1 400kcal meal a day.

4 - I will do at least 50 sit-ups every single day

5 - I will go to the library as often as possible and stay on top of reading as much as possible